A letter to one of my bestfriends.

"I love you, I just don't like you anymore."
 
   This scene from 'One Day' has always made me feel sad. I saw the film about two years ago and although the scene moved me, I could never really understand how it is possible to love someone but dislike them at the same time. That was then. Now, I fully understand what Emma meant.

  Everyone loves their bestfriends, right? Your bestfriends know you better than other mere acquaintances. They know what makes you tick, share your interests, know how to cheer you up when you're feeling down, know the things that you stand for and believe in, as well as your hopes and dreams and aspirations. Bestfriends become your family away from your family, kind of like your home away from home and you know that they'll always have your back.

  Then, how does this dislike come in, you ask? It starts to seep in when this bestfriend, the one who knows what makes you tick begins to subtly insult you every now and them. He'll claim it's just 'banter' and 'friendly teasing', but banter can only last so long. Is it 'banter' for your bestfriend to repeatedly mock the way that you talk, the Nigerian/British/American accent that you can't help because you grew up bilingual and spent the first half of your life living in another country? Is it 'banter' for your bestfriend to repeatedly put down your beliefs, going as far as to imply that there is a 'negative correlation' between intelligence and having a faith, even though he knows that these beliefs make you who you are? Is it 'banter' for your bestfriend to repeatedly suggest that he is better prepared for the world than you are because he went to a private school and you went to a state school? Is it 'banter' for your bestfriend to repeatedly make disparaging remarks about those that you know who give blood and are dyslexic, for example?

  Dear bestfriend, I love you, I really do but I'm afraid if this continues, I'll start to dislike you and this dislike might even become hate and I really don't want this to happen. How can I prevent this from happening? I'll stop bottling things up and I'll start calling you out when you say things that are not okay or PC. Please don't see this as me attacking you. I only want to save our friendship and save you from alienating me and others. Thanks and speak soon.